Relationships and Time

Imposing, asking of others, is a part of relationships, and relationships come out for me as I read about Mortenson's work. His relationships with the people of Korphe. His relationships with the many people along the way that end up becoming invested in his project. His relationships with other climbers, people who become benefactors for CIA. There is this give and take between Mortenson's vision, his determination, his commitment, and his ability to listen to the people he's working with. He forges ahead, but then when Haji Ali sits him down and gives him advice, he listens. "Haji Ali tuaght me to share three cups of tea, to slow down and make building relationships as important as building projects" (p.150).

I've been thinking about this all day, about how we (Americans?) tend to focus so much on building the project, and forget that the relationships are as important. And relationships take time, especially when you're crossing cultural, age, religious, language boundaries. Lately, as I struggle to get my own project off the ground, I've been thinking about how my project is partly about building relationships too. And building relationships often takes so much more time than we wish or expect. But I think Mortenson shows us that when you do take the time to build the relationships, the projects have much more potential.

I realize I have a lot more relationship-building to do here in Barcelona. That it might help to dedicate myself more vigorously to knowing and understanding people. Maybe that part is as important to building my own (dissertation research) project as it was in building Mortenson's first school. Even if it takes time.

The art of imposing

Reading the first few chapters about how Mortenson came to make his seemingly impossible commitment to a remote village in Pakistan, I was struck by a small thing: that those who make the most impact, are often willing to impose, or unaware of imposing, on whomever they come in contact with. What, for instance, possesed Mortenson to return to Korphe to recuperate, in effect asking the villaigers to sacrifice the best of their very scarce resources for his recovery? It is something I never would have done. But I find it difficult to shake my American sense of self-sufficiency, and perhaps Mortenson already understood what I am still learning. That by asking of others, we invite them to ask of us, and a mutually benneficial interdependence can flower.

Reading Books and Talking Across Cities

It's almost December, time to start reading! Let me know if you want to join the group so I can add you to the blog and we can all post and comment. I'm excited about the idea of reading and posting things that occur to me as I read throughout the month. I like the idea of seeing what others are thinking about as they read too. Especially given that the subject of Afghanistan is in the news so much lately, with President Obama giving his "Afghanistan Speech" this week. So let me know if you're in!